Les lecons d’une promenade dans le parc.

“Lessons from a walk in the park.”

(English translation)

My Jesus called me out for a walk with Him in the park today.

That’s where we often meet to spend time together. I hear him best when I’m outside in Creation. I can feel Him with me, beside me. It’s so comforting to have Him near. Sometimes I forget just how close He really is. Caught up in all of the day-to-day challenges, I find myself feeling lost in this excursion of life.

Where do I turn next?

…

Do you ever imagine that you’re somewhere else?

Sometimes I picture myself somewhere far from here. Where my troubles are left tucked neatly in a canvas backpack. Zipped tightly shut. One that I can conveniently toss in the back seat and forget about.

As I drive around my familiar little piece of this world, I imagine instead, that my eyes are seeing new places.

The French countryside.

Dusty roads and soft rolling hills. Barns scattered peacefully beneath the springtime sky.

Hmmmm…

Or maybe Italy. Vineyards.

Horizontal twisting of greens atop a meticulously fashioned guide. Organized rows patiently poised for the vine-dresser to gently tend.

The beauty of the landscape can easily distract me from the worries of the day. I find solace in these quiet spaces. Only birds singing, and the sound of the early morning breeze.

…

But Jesus calls me from my envisioning, and back to where He wants me.

Here…now.

Our walk, together.

Back to the little park right in my neighborhood.

It really is a lovely place. There are winding trails alongside the woods. Wildflowers blooming ~ their sweet scent delicately perfuming the air. The sun shines low in the sky, rising on its early morning journey.

Although my surroundings sing joyfully, my heart is aching today. And He knows it. He knows that I needed time with Him to find my way back to center. I’ve been off-kilter for too long now. Weeks have passed and my struggles entangle me.

My blessed friend and Savior has called me to meet Him here.

To teach me.

Breathing in the surrounding beauty, I begin to feel my shoulders drop. The tension in my body gradually subsides after hundreds of rhythmic strides. Nearing the end of the path, I feel Him nudge me off the trail and into a small garden.

…

It is springtime, and the gardeners have been pruning.

I immediately identify with the small bush at my feet. Some branches cut cleanly ~ like life cutting me to the quick. Recalling a painful comment. Or an unkind act that I witnessed. Other branches almost twisted off ~ resembling some of my recent feelings of loss. Slow, writhing realities that contort my heart. Leaving torn emotions. Open wounds, left vulnerable to this uncertain world.

But this is why I’m here.

Christ prunes us back, so that we can flourish in Him. New growth emerges as we walk more closely with Him. Better understanding who He is.

But the pruning ~ this shaping of our souls, can be painful.

I have come here to this little garden with anger packed into every pocket. Someone has done me harm and I’m no longer able to see clearly in this relationship. My vision is clouded by hurt. Feeling unsure and defensive, I cling to my old identities. My worn-out lenses through which I have been viewing this world ~ fear, resentment, anguish, negativity. Those old and ugly characteristics that I’d rather disown. But somehow, they feel safe. Uncomfortably familiar.

Christ has seen me in this place for too long, and He is here to extend His redemptive hand.

To pull me up out of my own muck.

…

I am bewildered as to why He has led me here.

To this little garden.

Not knowing what else to do, I begin to take notice of all that is around me. Maybe in the details I can begin to make some sense of things. At the very least, another distraction from all of the clutter in my head. The noise.Remaining present in the moment I ponder the nature of the teaching.

…

In relationships, it is easy to focus on the components of our individual experiences. Or the disconcerting characteristics of the other person. In pain, we remain in that still image. Magnifying the frustration.

Retaining thoughts of self preservation, we ignore the fact that we might have played a role in the seemingly hapless situation. We look only at angles that justify our means.

Our sense of what is ‘right’. But God offers us a wider lens.

Encouraging us to step back a bit.

When we breathe, and we take time to focus on the Cross, things look vastly different.

Suddenly we see that those old voices we have listened to, do nothing to truly serve us. Nothing to serve another. Instead, amplifying an already troublesome existence.

Christ called me here today.

That I might take a look from His perspective. To contemplate a truer, more honest viewpoint. In lieu of anger, an alternate respose to perceived disrespect.

Gradually, I have a new focal point. I begin to see a larger picture.

I begin to see beauty.

Mercy poured over me and finally I saw it.

Forgiveness.

My clenched and burdened heart began to soften. Anger and resentment were washed away by His grace ~ and humility flowed in.

I fell to my knees at that park bench and wept.

…

God was using this time in the garden to help me see His Grace. The metaphor of the bench, was a window. A way out. A reminder to surrender yet again.

Matthew 5:44

But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you.

…

I had been looking solely at the conflict. I had failed to recognize my own fault. My own brokenness. Carrying this judgement, my heart was bound by my pride and the consequence was the loss of peace.

A tremendous price to be paid.

When we find our worth in Christ, it takes the pressure off of our relationships with others. We can engage without having to prove ourselves. Without needing others to meet all of our needs.

He is the only security we will ever have.

Knowing that we are completely loved and accepted by our Father, we can rest and be present to see His will.

Not our own.

Jesus brought me to this little garden today to help me see just this.