Reflections and Receipts ~ the evidence of His love.

Sunrise.

An autumn morning.

The air, crisp.

Like apples.

In every direction a different exhibit of artwork on display.

Still life.

Portraits infused with depth of magnificent color. Seasonal intensity.

Changing amber hues of foliage now paused, cloaked in frost. A temporary lapse.

Bittersweet berries radiant against browns and earth.

Days are short. Shadows long.

Recessed spaces are illuminated by morning. The sky wakes as the sun meets the horizon.

Warm, golden light spills gently onto the day.

Nature pauses.

God’s graceful recipient. 

Psalm 89:11

The heavens are Yours; the earth also is Yours; the world and all that is in it, You have founded them.

Oh… to truly receive His great love!

…

I’ve been wandering for some time.

Evaluating my place. All the while, irritability has crept in. Leaving me feeling unsettled. Ready for change.

A change in my view.

A focus. A refining of perspective.

I want to see past this world.

Past the heartache. Past the empty. Past the reflection in the mirror. Past it all.

Beyond this existence to truly feel His embrace.

To sit safely with Him in unbounded Peace. In contentment and awe. Love wrapped around my unsteady heart.

Authentic rest.

This is where I long to be. 

But lately, I’ve noticed that there is too much blocking the way for me to touch that closeness. Too much stuff of this life. Old stuff.

Old wounds.

Old scars.

Old and worn-out lies of the enemy that I have believed far too long.

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For as long as I can remember I’ve been a better giver than receiver.

Since we were young, giving was at the forefront.

Offering some of our sandwich to a friend who didn’t have anything at lunchtime. Putting money in our “share” jar every week when allowance was passed out. Lending our mittens on a cold day at recess to the kid who didn’t have a coat.

But somehow along the way, I seemed to have gotten the balance mixed up.

Or maybe I was just absent the day they taught the lesson on how to humbly receive.

At any rate, I’ve learned that overdoing it in the giving department can leave us feeling short-handed in the reception area.

It’s so much simpler to give a compliment than to accept one.

Easier to reach out to another in need than to ask for help myself. I’m more likely to take time to sit in a space of encouragement with a friend than to allow someone to rally around me in my place of hurting.

Why?

Let’s look again at giving.

For me, sometimes the act of giving can be a distraction.

A diversion from the pain that I need to deal with. The emotions, the feelings, the thoughts and beliefs that keep me buffered. Those lies of the enemy that keep me feeling less-than.

Undeserving.

Not worthy.

And this negative space can be like a vacuum.

Creating a void.

An abyss between who I am today and who God is calling me to be.

An echo of the soul of the woman He’s making in me.

And when there is too much space between the giver and the receiver, communication gets lost.

Lines are blurred.

And it’s hard to truly receive.

Receiving in this physical world has to do with tangible evidence.

An acknowledgement of transference. A paper trail for goods and services exchanged.

Proof of transaction.

A confirmation.

But what about spiritual receiving?

What about the things that can’t be purchased? Those that can not be acknowledged with the eyes ~ only with the heart.

For this, we look to the Cross.

The greatest offering.

The Truth of our Savior that intersects the enemy’s conniving deception.

Splitting the canyon.

Bridging the crevasse to where we are. 

It is in this place that we discover the proof of our Father’s infinite love.

The evidence of His Glory!

Here, we can begin to truly receive.

Sitting amidst the wonder of His resurrection. Soaking in the bliss that this war has already been won. That we need no longer fight to prove our value.

To defend our worth.

Instead, we claim the Truth.

The truth that our Savior has come to redeem us! Unwrapping the lies that have held us bound. The layers of old and tattered are peeled away.

Leaving our souls renewed.

Open to receive His love.

…

And once we sit a while there, basking in this quiet and beautiful space, we recognize peace.

The overflowing gift of the Holy Spirit.

Allowing us to reflect His light back into this world.

Isaiah 6:10

Make the heart of this people dull,
And their ears heavy,
And shut their eyes;
Lest they see with their eyes,
And hear with their ears,
And understand with their heart,
And return and be healed.

This world where so many others are also wandering. Lost in the wilderness of overwhelm.

Dying to give.

And thirsting to receive. 

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As His children, we are the evidence of His grace in this world. 

We are the proof of His love by who we are.

How we engage.

How we care.

How we give.

So that others too, can then see past this world.

Past their pain to the hope of redemption.

And to the glorious promise of New Life in Him!

…

Dear Father God,

Like the sun that warms the earth each morning, may we spill over with the glow of Your everlasting love. 

Lead us to those who cry out for your embrace.  That You might use us in our world as the proof of who You are.

That we might be receipt.

And reflection.

In your Son’s most Holy and precious name, we pray.  Amen.

…